Fun and up to no good
A little bit of good, and a little bit of bad in everything. That’s when you know it’ll be remarkable.
It was quite a night, really. I never thought it would push through since we never done anything close to planning things properly. But it happened, that’s a lot to matter. And I am really thankful it did because I really needed those kind of quixotic shits some times.
I kind of liked it even though it is very wrong in all the perfect reasons. It was irrational and foolish, but that’s what I need to be right now—irrational and foolish. I needed this break. I’ve been over thinking things a lot to the point that I am self-destructing. What is even wrong with only one tactless night? All I wanted was to float and be carried away by the wind and unending mass of nothing. That’s the least thing the world could do for me in one night. And yes, I kind of got what I wanted.
The magic started with those awkward feeling of not knowing what the heck we’re doing, and being scared of evil everywhere. Thus, making us such baffled kittens. But we get by because we were natural blenders, I’ve noticed. Finally, getting drinks wasn’t really exciting because it wasn’t hard to do so but liquors sure help me a lot—gulping huge amounts of beer and savoring the sting of its taste, making the taste linger, and then sink into my tongue like a sponge. It helps me think (not over-think), not necessarily reasonable thoughts, but things that I wanted to do. Aside from beer, dancing (which is second to my nature) is awfully great. I was having so much fun and I bet my friend had too. The beer, I guess took its effect when I mostly ignored everyone around me and just kept dancing although they were the experts in this field of escapade.
I’ve watched different scenarios too.. Girls and boys dancing, getting a drink, taking a photograph, staring at us; there was this guy who was trying to make conversation with a girl I must have thought he liked because the way he looked at her was obviously bewildered. And then we were dancing again when a guy asked to dance with me, in which I naturally ignored. But the hoodie kid was insistent and desperate I kind of feel sorry for him so I just tugged my friend so we could leave to get another beer. The night, I thought, supposed to last a little longer but it didn’t.. And I find myself walking out of the magical place of escapes where I float and drift away from reality. Half of me don’t want to. As long as I’m still thinking of him, I don’t want to leave. But as I’ve said, there’s a little bit of bad in everything too so before I knew it, I was walking away from my temporary escape. Ha, finally escaping the escape of reality.. Insane words fluttering in my head.
The next things were a blur, I can’t recall a lot already. But we got in to a taxi after sobering up and hung out at the park. It was nice there. The warm breeze and plain night sky done it. It was quiet and motionless I swear I could here myself breath. My friend and I talked some more and been sobered up some more and I played in the swing and walked bare-footed in the damp concrete. I let the wind brush off my hair as I swing back and forth and it feels so right. Everything seems to be in place and I love being there for just the night.
The situation won’t change, I thought. Even though I’ve been here and I had fun it won’t change a single fact that something’s gone and I have to live with that. This weekend shenanigan was an escape—but it’s stupidly temporary. I would wish to do this every day but I know I could do better. I could keep living though it’s fucking harder now. Evenso, I can do this because I’m strong and I’ve been through a lot. I know it’ll be better. I just really wanted to float away for just a night. Successfully, I did
and I felt good.
he always felt they would come back to him. The feeling of loving her and being loved by her welled up in him, and he could taste the adrenaline in the back of his throat, and it wasn’t over, and maybe he could feel her hand in his again and hear her loud, brash voice contort itself into a whisper to say I-love-you in the very quick and quiet way that she had always said it. She said I love you as if it were a secret, and an immense one.
Anonymous asked: Do you get razbliuto to someone sometimes?
Oh yes, yes I do. A lot of times.
Anonymous asked: Why aren't you dancing anymore? Di ba you dance back in hs?
Wtf seriously. Just reading this made me nostalgic all of a sudden. Even though I’ve only been a part of the dance troupe on my fourth year in high school, dancing was a part of me ever since. I’m not dancing anymore because I have to focus on higher priorities. Hay….
Anonymous asked: Hi Caris! Can you suggest some outfit ideas for a girls night out? having a hard time picking the right one..
Night out you say? Every girl must have a little black dress which suits their figure. You can pair it with black or nude pumps or any stylish heels you have.
More suggestions: Pencil skirts and long sleeve mesh tops and blazers! Go for comfy foot wears so you can fully enjoy the night :)
